I used to play games ENDLESSLY
When I was a kid I could sit and play a game for a dozen hours straight. Was I an overweight child? Rude of you to ask but yes. That’s neither here nor there quite frankly and I demand we move on.
These days I’m an adult( as much as I have tried to suppress that fact) and that doesn’t leave me with a lot of time to play games. I have to work, pay bills, buy groceries, obsessively checking my teeth to convince myself I don’t have to pay for a dentist. You know, “life”.
Pause Break
So as of this writing I just woke up hung over from staying up late with my SO drinking and listening to music we liked when we were teenagers. ADULT!
The point of all this is that the things that give us an endless amount of joy as children either stop giving us that same feeling or we end up simply not having the time for them. For me its probably a little bit of both…well…20/80 joylessness and time. As you become older you start resenting the world for being what the world has always been which is only natural so 20% there. The other 80% comes from adult guilt and the need to justify ever little bit of nonproductive activity because you wouldn’t want to “waste time” doing something you “enjoy”.
Maybe adulthood isn’t so much about denying yourself things but deciding for yourself what is important.People often talk about maintaining a sense of self and self worth. Mental health days, eating out once in awhile, purposefully pretending not to hear that one coworker. These are all things that help with keeping you you and happy. So fuck it? Do what makes you happy? Easy ideals that I clung to in the more difficult moments of my life but now I have people relying on me…OK a very self sufficient girlfriend and a cat but that cat is VERY demanding.
So when does the wave of life decisions and responsibilities bend the tree to the breaking point? Never? Always? Probably both. Like most people I had dreams that I put aside for the sake of freedom and Independence from parents who loved me and provided for me. Now I find myself in an equilibrium where I can entertain these notions again. Hence The New Sage is born. It’s something, for now.
Well its Sunday and my apartment is clean and my head hurts so I’m going to dive into some game or netflix show or…both.
Ill let you know how it went tomorrow.
The New Sage 